Saturday, April 27, 2013

Are All Mercedes Benz Drivers Idiots?


I mean, do they pay extra to exhibit the intelligence of a rubber plant, or does it come naturally?

As I, and everyone sitting in the front of the restaurant couldn't help but notice, a man tried for a good 10 minutes to parallel park his Mercedes sedan. Even his lady friend was little help and kept shaking her head.He stopped traffic more than once as he swung out into the left traffic lane and tried backing into the spot again and again. He finally gave up and drove away.

A Mercedes sport convertible with top down sailed into a parking spot in front of the restaurant, neglecting to brake before hitting the curb. The loud crunching sound of concrete kissing metal made her yell, but the damage was done. The bumper fell off as she tried to back out of the situation. The whole scene played out before our eyes - tow truck and all.

On the walk home after work, as I was passing a beauty salon an obviously just coiffed young woman was getting into her Mercedes SUV ready to drive home.  I noticed there was a baby carrier on the roof and she appeared to be unaware .  As I tapped on the driver's side window I startled her.  Looking irritated, she opened the window and groaned, "what do you want?" I said, "well I think you're missing something.  Unless the baby on the roof of this car isn't yours."  Her eyes became as big as saucers, then she burst into tears.  She got out of the car and after securing the carrier in the back seat, thanked me and gave me a hug.  She was still crying as she drove away. And rightly so. The self-centered bitch should remember this day when she could have killed her child

I was still unnerved as I continued the walk home.  Enjoying a few olives which should remedy the jitters.

Busy restaurant today. Beautiful weather, and warmer temperatures brought many folks into town. It was all good. Glad to be home and preparing supper.  After the olives, of course.

And so it goes.
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9 comments:

  1. my boss drives one; guess he is trying to make up for his "shortcomings" in another area! bwhahahaha!

    it was a loverly day here also; 65 degrees, the house windows are open (my allergies will hate me later), da boids is singin' (said in a NY accent), and my baseball team beat up on the NY mets.

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  2. Wow! You probably saved a life today!
    Good job!

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  3. @anne marie: we deserve this great weather.

    @Brian: That's what made me jittery on the way home. The thought of what could have happened to the baby is still confronting me. I get the shivers when I think of what could have been.

    Thanks for the visits, you guys.

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  4. You were in the right place at the right time to save a life. Yes, it's very unsettling. An olive or two might help with that. (I'd need a shot after something like that.)

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  5. Wow. The baby on the car roof? Scary!

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  6. Yes they are idiots; there was a double blind study in JAMA last year on the topic.

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  7. Oy vey! and I'm not even Jewish. That child doesn't even know you saved it's life! I wanted to get Mercedes vert. But now I might lose too many IQ points just driving one. lol.

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  8. Some cars can parallel park themselves these days. Mercedes must have missed that boat for its looney owners. But I don't think there is an app to remind you to put the baby IN and not ON the car.

    David

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  9. A baby on the roof of the car?! You absolutely saved a life that day. She should of gotten out her Mercedes and dropped to the ground and kissed your toes. Maybe someday in the future that baby will come back when he/she is an adult and thank you for saving her/his life. Of course I'm assuming you'll still be at your hosting duties at the Two Crazy Guys eatery.
    Retired in Delaware

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