Blue Monday. How Are You, Blue Monday?

Awoke at 4:30 am, that guy Fats Domino knew what he was singing about.  The weekend somehow skimmed by leaving me mostly unaware of its passing.  Aside from breaks to scavenge for food, the world didn't insert itself into my consciousness most of the time.

Spoke to the sister for a brief time yesterday. She's not doing well, so I said little about my health. I didn't tell her that she isn't a viable match for my transplant. I just couldn't.  And though she asked, I offered even less about the financial mishugas that morphs into something different with each new mail delivery. I can't keep up anymore. 

There were no phone calls - only one text asking if I planned to attend the Staff Holiday Party last night.  I didn't feel up to driving in the dark, no one offered a ride, and didn't feel party-hardy at the time, anyway.  I didn't go.

However, There were messages waiting this morning from Linda (in Ireland with family) Debbie (Arizona with grandkids), Andrei (in Belarus), Manuel (Dominican Republic),  letting me know they arrived safely and that they were thinking of me.  Thoughtful notes that cheered me, preparing me for the bullshit of a day ahead.

There was blood work at 7:30 followed by the appointment with the doctor to discuss the results of the incident at the hospital Friday.   I didn't expect any answers; I've run out of questions, and that's the way it is. Scheduled for another transfusion on Wednesday, if not before.  Depends on what the Christiana surgeon finds in his sleuthing tomorrow.

Stopped by the restaurant on the way home to say good-bye to a few more folks leaving this week for their home countries to be with family and friends. Had a short chat with one of the locosguys and will try to catch up with both of them before week's end. 

I see that Peter O'Toole has passed, as has Tom Laughlin. Interesting men in their own right.  These deaths almost always come in 3s. Now I see Joan Fontaine (Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.)  has left us, and that rounds out the trilogy. They enjoyed rich, full lives. May they all rest in peace. 

Needing something to lift my spirits after the morning medical madness, I decided a Bayberry Candle would add a little something to the atmosphere at the apartment.  They're not easy to find. Apple & cinnamon, evergreen, winter linen (?) and Christmas spice seemed to be everywhere - but no bayberry.  Finally went directly to Yankee Candles. They have the best, anyway.  Just lit it a few minutes ago and it smells wonderful in here already. 

This afternoon the mailbox was overflowing with junk mail and more BS letters from various government agencies.  The junk went into the recycle bin while the others remain unopened.  As I said before, the chances of there being any good news is slim, so why bother?

Light snow is forecast overnight (yawn!) we shall see.

And so it goes.

*